A funeral

I was expecting all the time. Each time i left her there was something behind my head that used to tell me this is the last time. So I always turn back her and see her for one last time. That day
what i saw was my grandmother standing there on the door telling me adieu. Her eyes were shining as two droplets of tears slowly came out of her old eyes. She smiled at me and waved a good bye like she knew that was our last meeting on this earth.

Then one morning while i was sleeping in the college hostel my mobile phone rang. It was dad
he told me the grandmother has fallen sick and is in hospital. She had a minor Heart Attack. It
didn't take much time for me to realize what is coming. I packed up my bag and everything and with the help of my friends took the next train to my home town.

I had told Dad that I will stay in the hospital and take care of her as i used to do previously also whenever she fell sick. But I was preparing myself for anything.

I reached Ernakulam in the morning. There I saw Siddique, Dad's cousin waiting for me in the Railway Station. The moment i saw him I realized that my grandmother is gone. For a second I felt like the whole world is moving away from underneath my leg. Everything went into a slow motion after that. Siddique was asking me something about this and that but all I could hear was some sound which meant nothing at all. I ignored his questions and started preparing myself for the worst.

There she was. All covered in while cloth. There was that smile on her face when everybody around her were crying their heart out. I looked at her face for a second and just moved away. I didn't cry, No not even a single droplet of tear. I had lost everything in the world that I had, but I did not cry. Was it bravery or was it that i was not sad I don't know. What i know was that i was confused and was thinking about rest my life which i had to live without the person who i loved the most Or should i say the only person i loved in the world.

I did not talk to anybody. I was very quite the whole day. I was under Microscope of every relative in the house who had come to tell the final adieu to the most important person in the family.

The funeral was over. I could very well feel that vacuum occupying the most part of my heart. I was not able to think anything as i was. I was quietly sitting on the Deevan coat, It was then when i saw her.

What do you think about a Homoeopathic Doctor.

Doctor is OK.

But homoeopathy??

Madhyamam Sunday 12 August 2007

Muslim Boy, Age 26, MCA, Fair, Working Abroad,
Aristocrat Family, From North Malabar Settled in Ernakulam,
invited from graduated girls from northern kerala/Abroad.

Being a Biker

After i got my new biker jacket, Yesterday i have officially i have become a biker. It is official now. Thaaliyaaaaaaaaaaan


Thank you thank you...

Actually i 've been a biker all my life. You know bikers they drive pass all those exotic locations. They just drive past and does not stay. Bikers drive and don't get stuck with one single place.

I ve been that since i don't even know. No long term relationship. I have been having this policy of out of sight out of mind policy for so long that now when i look back i find myself to be very blank. No real relationships with no people. Depressing..


I was never a depressive though. I have had lots of fun till date. it is that i dont commit into long term relationship. I have never allowed people to come in very close to me. Like intimate relationship and all no. Yes I have never allowed that.

When mom said that she is looking a girl for me, I got absolutely flattered. I couldnt even breath for some seconds.


Will i be able to commit for a relationship that has to last for nothing less than a life time. ?

But i have a solution for this problem. I will cut my life into these small pieces. I am too good at these short relationships. By doing this i can have a new life each day. Forget what happened the day before. That means i can still be as i am and still have a happy family life.

Cool yaar.. I am so brilliant .. I am so proud of myself.. huff..

When i started writing this i was totally confused and frightened. but i feel lot lighter now. I think I am ready for it and i should engage myself into it.

Lets see who that lucky girl is.

Addendum: I knew you will read this when i started writing this so i am sorry if i have disappointed you... :-)

Am i ready for it..??

May 11 2007,

I will be completing my 26 long years of my life on this Earth.

Question marks are already raising.

"????? When are you getting married ????"

It is true that i have already started to feel the hole in my life. and i strongly believe it is high time to find someone to fill the vacant area in my heart.

But am i ready for it. ?

Can i take the extra responsibility of one more person? Do i have the nerve to take on the pressure?

Allowing a person to masquerade into my privacy is jerking even the smallest of the bone.

What about money?

Will i have an happily ever after?

Love Marriage or Arranged Marriage?

I was never that guy who goes around the park looking for pretty girls. But the thought of having only one women for the rest of my life is really scaring the S*** out of me.

nouwoifenoienfoe

"Pullquotes... can bring a reader back into your text..."

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An Evening with Faheemosphere

When Hema told me that she has got two tickets for water. I didn't had think twice to decide that i am taking them. There were two reasons

1. I had to watch the movie at any cost.
2. It was time for doing back the favour for she had taken for Morning show ticket of Mozhi from me.

Who will i go with? My goodness. Who will come with me for a movie like water. My first choice was Hemavathy a friend of mine who i have never seen. I know her only through the short messages we had exchanged. She refused to come as she was worried about her so called "brother" who is her colleague from the previous company she worked in. Anyway thank god she rejected the offer. Hema was also not happy with somebody using her name. :-)

Next option was Fahim the old class mate from crescent. Smiji warned me about going with him. I knew he is a kanjoos makhi choose but as always i was looking at the better part of his. I asked him to come he happily accepted the offer.

Saturday evening we met at the beach station. It was not very late when i realized i have done a great mistake. He was asking 1000 questions for buying a bloody snack. I should have watched the movie alone than spending money on such a selfish, self centered person.

Ya I am sounding rude. I know.

What was most painful was his review about the movie. When i asked him how was the movie he said and i quote "It was good but the climax was not good".

EEEEEEEEEErrrrrrrrrrr

What the bloody hell...

It is an evening i will soon like to forget..

Completely out of Control

When i am exited and happy i go completely out of control. I begin acting like a drunk person and i wont have any clue of what i am doing.

And that is exactly what happened today.

I got my n73 after a long wait. I didn't have any idea. What to do. The joy went to the height of even making me think "Was this the s*** i was longing for such long". I got my papers done and i reached the office. There (or is it here, I am still in the office sitting without any clue of what to do the rest of the evening) everything was in a disarray. The news which was waiting for me was Depressing news "The Database restoration process which was running from yesterday night 8 has failed the minute i entered the office. :D".

I was not moved with the news. Pratosh was sweating in the A/C room. He was Jumping from Asia to Africa and Africa to Asia and was pissed off to see the glow in my face. I was in a kind of "f*** off I don't care about your goddamn restoration" attitude.

Big boss was also not impressed with me. He asked Hemnath to accompany Pratosh to the data centre instead of me.

I said no problem.

I was exploring the mobile when this person came in.

He came straight at me and shook hands with me. For a minute i didn't have any clue who this person is. All the faces i remembered started running through my brains monitor. A match was not found. Then i made this wild guess. Yes "This is the person who sits just behind me."

I use this person's mobile charger every day(without asking his permission). When ever he leaves his seat i connect my mobile in his charger. When he comes back i give a flat smile + unplug the mobile + say Thank you. He replies no problem. So this was happening for some time now. This made me guess that the person came to was the same person.

Coming back to the point, the next second i showed my mobile to him and said hey i got a new mobile. He got the mobile from me and started exploring through it .There was this strange look in his face.

That rang the bell some where behind the medulla oblangata. Then i looked around there he is the mobile charger guy is sitting in his seat.

Then who the hell is this guy who is now having my n73 in his hand. My eyes was looking all around the place. Oh god please tell me who is this person. ??

That is when i found the tag around his neck which read "CHYbernet SHOftware SHYstems".

Oh my god he is from my company.

I don't know much people in CSS. Who is this guy ? what does he need. The bell rang again. But this time it was not near the oblangata.

Yes This is the Human Resource Guy who is in charge of the 99 people who are working here in peep international. LOL..

This is the second time i am meeting him. I had met him two months back when he came here to introduce himself to me and rajiv.

I still cant remember his name. I got my foot on the floor and asked him how he is and explained him about the job and the mobile.

The guy walked away happily.

And i got another opportunity to laugh at myself.
and that is exactly what i am doing now.

CRAP CRAP CRAPPY

I started this blog for crapping and that is exactly what i am going to do with this blog.

This Blog will have the most unforgettable foo paaah's (faux puax) i have commited.