That was'nt Me

My Dear Ruby,

I am writing this to tell you how much great full i am in having you. You made me realize what i have been missing in my life. You have brought me to a place where when i look back i see nothing but darkness. You have always blinded me with the amount of love and care you have shown to me. It is nothing like i have ever seen in my life before. You redefined me. You made to have a new outlook about myself and about everything i ever knew. You gave me everything which i believed only lived in fairy tales. You take care of when ever i play child around you. You take care of me and support me no matter what. You always make sure that you give me importance in whatever you do. You always know what i want and you adjust according to it. When i think about you I feel like I have got everything in life and I am complete. The word 'I' has become so alien to me that when ever I use that I feel awkward and stupid.

I am leaving this note incomplete because i know it will take "for ever" to finish this topic.

:)

May be once I see her. Things will go back to normal.

I have become very vulnerable, I can no longer handle sadness.

But I thought I can say anything to her.

 

Yeah but she is not well. I should see that also

Circle

I have all the reason to be sad. I shouldn't have asked her in the first place.

Back on the No man’s Land

I feel like writing something terrible. I don't know what to write and what to think. So it is better that I don't write anything. But if I am not writing then what is the point. So I will write.

I am feeling very lonely. I am not sure is it because she shouted at me or is it because DAD said there is nothing to say. Whatever triggered it now I am heaving a very very heavy heart. A feeling that I had forgotten for a loooooong time.

 

I feel like hearing to ishanth's theme for ever.

it is time i closed you down..!!!

I dont need you any more. I dont have anything to tell you. your existence now is just a mere trace of my past. You dont have anything to do with me no more. I think it is time that you impose upon yourself a mercy killing or you die a death which will be soon forgotten..